My Pre-Midlife Crisis

I Lost During March Madness

Here it is - the time of year no lingerie can compete with. No food, no temptation, no striptease or lapdance can hold a candle to it. Welcome to March Madness, baby. In years past, I have made the mistake of attempting to visit my now husband during our spring breaks, which usually fall during the second or third weeks of March. But this time belongs to basketball and basketball alone. There is no place for me in this, except sitting silently on the sofa for days at a time. This is my husband and I's "together time" now.

Last year I made the fatal mistake of getting married on Saturday, March 20th. My husband said he did not care where we went for the honeymoon as we had so little time before we had to both return to our respective campuses to teach classes the following week. So we did not plan a honeymoon. Instead, we went to Hattiesburg, MS an Mobile, AL and found a room with a ot tub. You would think a honeymoon and a hot tub would be a great combination, but there was one thing wrong - there was a TV in the room too, and it came out of the armoire and swiveled so you could sit in the hot tub and watch TV at the same time. That same time was March Madness. So, my honeymoon was filled with basketball.

This weekend almost one year later, I find myself losing out once again. My husband and I are in a hotel room as I am attending a conference during the days until 4. Tonight we went out for a wonderful fondue dinner. We dressed nicely, but I knew he wanted to rush back to the hotel for the announcement of the brackets. As we got into the room, I took off my jacket, turned my back to him, lifted my hair, and asked if he could unzip me. Well, he unzipped me and turned on the TV. I told him that he was supposed to "cop a feel" at least while he is back there, and he halfheartedly patted my butt and went back to watching ESPN. I sulked off to put on my pajamas and painted my nails for tomorrow's conference in complete silence. Now, it took a lot of effort to be silent - it is not in my blood to do so. But I was trying to make a point. This point was not noticed. In fact, he turned to me in bed and said "Thanks for being so good to me." I was tempted to cuss, but I did not. Now I am up writing this blog, and he is snoring fast asleep in bed. So much for my romantic evening the weekend before our 1 year anniversary. I imagine next weekend will be even worse.

So, for al you women out there married to sports freaks - I feel your pain. I feel your frustration. For all you women thinking getting married over spring break will be a good idea - don't. Even if he doesn't know a thing about basketball, you never know if it might happen.

I could have picked April, but that starts baseball season, and don't even get me started on that.

posted by No Longer In Crisis @ 3/13/2005 09:23:00 PM