My Pre-Midlife Crisis

There now exists evidence that I would make a good thief. OK, a very small amount of evidence that I would make a decent shoplifter. OK, I would suck, but that is not the point. The point is this:

Cookie's Auntie June sent her an enormous box of clothes - all beautiful and all for summer. Well, it's now in the upper 70s and muggy here, so Cookie's been wearing them one outfit at a time, and I came to the last of the outfits, and lo and behold...

a security ink tag still attached!!!

Dang it.

I didn't want to tell Auntie June because she would feel bad, and she lives in FL, and it wouldn't be worth the postage and gas back and forth, and I didn't even know where she had bought it.

So, I googled it. God bless google.

I came across threaded discussions on the topic ranging from power tools to magnets. I had even brought the outfit in to work in hopes that a co-worker with kids, or a co-worker who had worked in retail would have a secret. The only idea said co-worker had was to freeze it and then use pliers. Yikes. I pictured flying glass shards and ink all over the place.

Then I saw a cool idea:

Take a large think rubber band (the kind mail carriers use to bundle packages) (hey, I have a bunch on my desk) and wrap it tightly around the pin holding the two halves together. Slowly wind and twist the rubber band tightly around the pin, and you'll see the halves gradually move apart. When the rubber band is all the way around and you can't wrap anymore, slowly and carefully twist the rectangular flat piece (the one without the ink in it). You'll hear snapping. Pull out slowly and gently and you'll keep hearing popping, and then - wha-la - it pops off - no ink, no glass - just two complete halves of a security tag successfully removed.

I am a pimp. I even had to show co-workers my skill.

I even had to take a picture of it, so you would believe me.

And, oh yeah, I did it over an empty trash can "just in case". And, yeah, I was scared. :)

My daughter and I are both gangsta.