Li'l Snapper
My dad had given this little baby his nickname - we shall call him "Snapper". I'm really not sure why - Dad just called him Li'l Snapper. So, Snapper it shall be. I figure we can call his older brother "Jack" to stay with the fish trend.Snapper is a vision of perfection. He was born Sunday, and weighed 9 lbs., 5 ounces and was almost 21 inches long. He is healthy and doing great. He looks like the Anne Gedes babies that you see photographed in a cabbage or as a big flower - that perfect.
He is with us because bio-dad has an anger management problem and Jack (who is his step-child) ended up in foster care 6 weeks ago. When Snapper was born, he couldn't go home because bio-dad had not fulfilled his plan dictated by the state. Apparently he has done some things and not others, and slowly at that. Bio-mom has two other children who live with their father (another man) somewhere else. Not a good situation for anyone.
For now, Snapper will live with us. Jack will join us on Decemebr 26th (if not earlier) because his foster family is going on vacation out of state starting on December 26th and will be gone a week. (Pretty poor planning, if you ask me - but then again, no one asked). This was this foster family's first placement, and now 6 weeks into it, Jack has to go somewhere else because his foster family wouldn't take the newborn as well and siblings need to stay together. Enter Michael and Tamara stage right.
Jack will have his second birthday in January, so if we have them until then, we will be planning a little celebratation for the first time ever. That would be pretty darn cool.
Yesterday, we just lounged on the sofa with Snapper - admiring him and letting it sink in that we are foster parents again. In this situation, we really have to look at it as short-term while bio-dad does whatever he needs to do for the state to be satisfied that the children would be safe around him. (His threatening to kidnap the baby in front of the police yesterday upon the baby's removal was not a good start.) But, from what I can see, children are returned to birth parents rather quickly - especially newborns, whom the courts see as needing to bond with their birth mother especially (why not a birth father, I'm not sure - as research shows the relationship with the father has more impact on self-esteem throughout the lifespan...but, I digress.)
I have to write about something - though it will seem to appear out of nowhere for no reason... Snapper is circumcised. This bothers me on many levels as I am strongly opposed to the practice (as much as I am female genital mutilation) for many reasons. What was painful was knowing the baby had urinated, and that it had burned where his tiny penis had been cut. It is so raw and angry red, I can hardly stand to touch it to put the salve on it with each diaper change. I tell him how sorry I am that it hurts. There are little blood spots where the diaper touched his penis, and I cringe when I see that. I wish people made a more informed decision - one not based on "tradition" or what might "look better", but a decision based on logic and knowledge. We are the only nation in the world that circumscises baby boys for cosmetic reasons. 85% of the world's men are not circumcised. Once again, the feminist in me digresses....
Michael is home with Snapper today so I can be at work...blogging and not working. He he he (wicked evil laugh). I don't want to be here - I want to be home watching in case he makes a noise or moves - or breathes.
The nursery has now been changed out into boy-stuff. The crib has blue sports bedding on it now. My inner feminist has now slapped the crap out of me - she would have suggested something nice and gender-neutral instead of buying different bedding for different genders. My inner homemaker won that round.
Today Snapper will join Jack for a visit with bio-mom and perhaps angry bio-dad at the CHFS office. My darling husband is taking him in for the visit. If bio-dad pulls any crap, it will just draw out this process longer. Apparently bio-mom is pretty good - we just hope it all goes well.
We will also learn today how the workers will want to handle Jack's transition into our home.
Oh yeah, and in the middle of all this is our new house! We close on the 22nd. Yes, 3 days before Christmas. Now we will not get to go home, because we can't take the boys out of state for now. But we will plan to visit family some other time - or bring them up here. We have estimates from movers, and we think they will come and move us on or about the 28th. The good news is that because it is a local move and the off-season for moving, it will cost us well less than a thousand dollars for everything - maybe even more like $700. Have we packed up anything - um...no. Ha! What a circus.
Oh, and I have to give a final exam tonight at 6:30 and I still haven't finshed deciding what questions to use and which ones to omit. How tempting it would be to walk in, give everyone an A, and leave. I am so done with the semester.
I will certainly update regularly. Thank you all so much for your encouragement.
posted by No Longer In Crisis @ 12/14/2005 11:40:00 AM
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