Adventures in On-Line Dating IV: The Only Man Who Could Ever Reach Me Was The Preacher Man
His name was Joe. Joe Boring. I am not lying. Had fate carried different plans for us, I could have been Mrs. Tamara Boring. Have mercy. That alone is sufficient reason for keeping your last name post-marriage. But I digress...A little about Joe - he was just a couple of years older than me, a pastor of a church in Alpharetta, GA, into sales with another job during the week, divorced, with a 7-year old daughter named Madison, and a re-married ex-wife who lived about an hour away who had custody of Madison (more on that in another blog).
Joe had left a message on my cell phone the night I'd left Mike's house admitting to myself there was no future for us as a couple. Joe and I had only e-mailed each other so far, and the last exchange we'd had he asked to me to answer the question "What is it like to be in love?". I replied with the following:
It's like eating cold watermelon on a hot summer day. It's the feel of soft, cool green grass between your toes. It's your favorite song that you love to sing at the top of your lungs. It's the feel of a down comforter on a chilly fall night. It's the stillness of a dark night illuminated by fireflies. It's like everything you've ever felt before rolled up into one - yet, it's unlike anything you've ever felt.
That's pretty moochie now that I look back on it. But Joe said that of everyone he'd ever asked that of, I was the only one who's response made him feel something. Wow. That was the message on my phone - and he wanted to talk soon.
Several days later, I was at work late and my cell phone rang again. It was Joe. I got up and closed and locked my door, and we talked for more than an hour about all sorts of things. And we laughed and laughed. And we prayed together and thanked God for our new-found friendship and asked that he lead us where we were to take it. When I hung up, I realized I was flushed and warm. Whew - what was wrong with me? Was I ill?
Over the next two weeks, Joe would call me in the middle of my workday at the office - just to see how my day was going. He was doing a lot of traveling with work, so he would put his phone on speakerphone mode while he was driving. We'd usually end each phone call with a little prayer of thanks to God, and with anything that was going on that was of concern. Sometimes at night, he would call and talk to me just before heading to bed in another hotel room. He called once while parked looking at Lake Michigan as the sun was setting. He said it made him think about his new friend, Tamara, and how nice it would have been to share this sunset with her (ME!). Wowzers. I was hooked, and we'd never even met.
But one night, he said he had told some folks at the church he pastored about this woman he'd met and been talking to. His friends were worried that if he didn't get to Columbus to meet me soon, someone else might snatch me up. (There were no other prospects at the time, but I made no effort to correct him.) We agreed to meet one Saturday afternoon - at my place. A bold move for Tamara! Since I had seen his picture, there were no surprises in the looks department. He was a huge man - 6'4" and probably pushing 300 lbs. But he looked adorable, and we gave each other a great big hug as soon as he walked through the door. We just grinned and giggled as we both held hands with our arms outstretched as we pretended to "inspect" each other. He had gone to UGA, and the since the dawgs were playing that day, I wore red just to be funny. He got the humor immediately, and liked that about me (even though I had graduated from UF and was therefore NOT a UGA fan, to say the least).
We had lunch downtown, and before the food arrived the waitress asked if we had been dating just a short time. We laughed and asked why she wondered, and she said, "Because you're holding hands across the table and you look so damn cute." We laughed so hard people were turning around to see what was so funny. After lunch, once we were back in his car, he asked if I wanted to see pictures of his daughter. (Gulp - I had never dated anyone with children before). "Of course", I exclaimed. Oh, she was so beautiful - she looked like I did when I was 7 - dark brown eyes, and long, straight dark brown hair. I didn't have to pretend when I told him she was about the cutest little thing I'd seen in a long time. He had her every other weekend, and that day his mom was watching her so he could go on this date with me. He told me that it was important that any woman he got involved with want to become Madison's step-mom. Oh mercy. I didn't know if I was ready for that, but I sure did like Joe a whole lot.
Back at my place after lunch, we crashed on the sofa to catch the end of the GA-Auburn game. Afterwards, we were catching another game that wasn't nearly as interesting when Joe asked, "What do you keep lookin' over at me and grinnin' for? What are you thinkin'?" I declare, out of nowhere popped my answer without hesitation: "I was wonderin' if you were going to kiss me." He laughed out loud, and then said he had been sitting there wondering how to ask permission. No permission needed. Well, we had no problems in the area of "chemistry". But being a good preacher and following his own teachings, he stopped there. Damn it, I really needed sex too. It had been so long! But we giggled and watched the end of the game, and Joe headed back. He called me from the road, and said that he was so giddy he'd forgotten to ask if I wanted to pray together before he left. So, we prayed together over the phone.
Of course, after that I burned up my cell phone calling every girlfriend and then my mom to report on my good fortune in the date-department.
The next day after church, I got a call from Joe - asking if I'd like to drive up to Alpharetta and have dinner with him and his Dad and Madison (his daughter), stay the night (he offered to get me a hotel room nearby), and then have a holiday cookout the next day with his daughter and his mom. Without hesitation, I accepted the offer, and as soon as I could shower and pack a bag, I was off like a shot.
But all I kept thinking about was meeting Madison. I'd never dated someone with a child. What would meeting her be like? How come he was having me meet her so soon? What was that about?
To be continued...
posted by No Longer In Crisis @ 7/21/2005 01:05:00 PM
<< Home