Questions and Answers
Cindy asked us to answer some questions, and then posted answers to some that others had asked her. Rather than answer in the comment section, I figured I'd start writing here (as I can get wordy).What is YOUR favorite family tradition?
My family started collecting Hallmark Christmas ornaments when I was so little I can't even remember some of them. Each year, we would get out the boxes of decorations, and unpacking those special ornaments was so exciting. We would often buy each other the son, daughter, mom, and dad ornaments each year - and getting to see them every year was really neat. Each Christmas, my Grandmother also had a special tree we called the "toyland tree". The only ornaments we put on the tree were ones that she and I went shopping for together - and they had to be some kind of toy - a rocking horse, a jack in the box, a choo choo train - any toy was fine as long as it was one she and I had picked out together. Several years ago, when we had all grown up and I was married, she gave me all the ornaments that had survived the many years. Those are still my very favorite ones. I can't wait to pick out new Christmas tree ornaments with my own kids someday. I know that Michael isn't a big fan of holidays and decorations and celebrations and all that, but I hope he comes around once children are a part of our lives.
How did you find my blog?
I found Cindy's blog via her comment on mine. I believe with all my heart that God led her to my blog so that I would see a joyful example of a Christian woman who is going through much of what I am as well, and who had already embraced what I was struggling to accept with my infertility. She literally changed the way I prayed after reading her story. Now, I am thankful God made Michael and I "special" so that we would someday be parents for a child who wasn't ours by birth - but ours by His divine hand.
Is there anything you wish I'd write more about?
I hope that someday Cindy will write more about her relationship with Brien. It's not that I just want her to tell-all, air-all. Nor do I simply wish to live vicariously through her (though with all the excitement, I'm sure it would be easy)! But I do know that my own husband and I have very different perspectives on family and family life. It will be difficult for him to balance work and home, and feel that he is able to get as much done professionally as he would like to (or feels he has to) do. The truth is that Michael never saw himself getting married, and definitely never saw himself having children. It has been a struggle for him to get to this point where he can now say that having a family might be a nice thing. But he does not get excited, or buy things, or build things for a nursery or playroom. I wonder where that comes from with Brien. I want to know how to help my husband discover how to have joy, and not just contentment. I want to help him look forward to things instead of just worrying about them.
What do you think about changing the name of a 6 month old baby? What about a 1 year old? A 2 year old?
Certainly, I think it will be more difficult the older a child is. I wrote some about this already in an earlier posting. In short, there are far too many children with bizarre, juvenile, or highly inappropriate and misfortunate names. Our social worker told us that in the recent past, she has placed little girls named "Heaven", "Precious", and "Fantasy". These poor little children already have stripper names. I really wouldn't care how old "Fantasy" was - she needs a new name. Can you imagine the giggles (or worse) when the graduate admission committee sees her application for med school?
I do see the possibility that a child will come into our home, and we will like their name, and find it very appropriate and suitable for writing on a job application, or followed by the title "attorney at law", or behind the prefix "Dr." or "President" or "Dean". If that is the case, I'm sure the name will stay. We think the odds of that happening are quite low.
Age does make a difference to us - re-naming an infant would be an easier transition. For an older child, we would hope that the first name might make an acceptable middle name. Perhaps the new name can start out as a "nickname".
I love this! Let's keep the questions going.
posted by No Longer In Crisis @ 9/07/2005 12:00:00 AM
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